Questions for couples
45 deep questions for couples
These questions go past small talk. They ask about fears, family, hard moments and what makes you feel loved. Take your time with them. One deep question can fill a whole evening.
How to play
Answer on your own
Pick a question. You each answer without seeing the other's answer. Write it down or keep it in your head.
Guess your partner's answer
Before you share, guess what your partner said. On pick-one questions, guess which option they chose.
Reveal together
Share both answers at the same time. See who guessed right, then talk about why.
Duotone's Play tab works the same way. You each answer on your own phone, guess your partner's pick, and see both answers once you've both answered.
The questions
- 1.
When did you first know you loved me?
- 2.
What's something you've never told anyone, but would tell me?
- 3.
What do you need more of from me right now?
- 4.
What's a fear you carry that I might not know about?
- 5.
What part of your childhood shaped how you love?
- 6.
When do you feel most understood by me?
- 7.
What's a moment you felt let down by me, and what would have helped?
- 8.
What does feeling safe in a relationship mean to you?
- 9.
What's something you're still learning to forgive yourself for?
- 10.
How have I changed you, for better or worse?
- 11.
What do you wish I asked you about more often?
- 12.
What was the hardest moment in our relationship so far, and what did it teach you?
- 13.
What's a dream you've quietly given up on?
- 14.
When do you feel most like yourself?
- 15.
What's one thing you'd change about how we argue?
- 16.
What makes you feel appreciated, even on a bad day?
- 17.
What's a belief you've changed your mind about since we met?
- 18.
What do you find hardest to say out loud?
- 19.
Who taught you the most about love, and what did they teach you?
- 20.
What's something about me you'd never want to change?
- 21.
When you're stressed, what do you need from me?
- 22.
What's a memory with me you go back to when you miss me?
- 23.
What does a good day together look like to you?
- 24.
What's one way I could support your goals better?
- 25.
What's something you're proud of that you rarely talk about?
- 26.
Is there anything you've been carrying alone that I could help with?
- 27.
How do you want to feel when you think about us in ten years?
- 28.
What's a small thing I do that makes you feel loved?
- 29.
What do you think we do better together than apart?
- 30.
What's a lesson from your parents' relationship you want to keep, or leave behind?
- 31.
When did you last cry, and what was it about?
- 32.
What's something you want me to understand about your family?
- 33.
What do you think is our biggest strength as a couple?
- 34.
What's an insecurity that sometimes shows up in our relationship?
- 35.
What does home feel like to you?
- 36.
What's the kindest thing anyone has ever done for you?
- 37.
When do you feel distant from me, and what brings you back?
- 38.
What's something you'd like us to talk about more openly?
- 39.
What part of yourself do you hope I always see?
- 40.
What's a promise you'd like us to make to each other?
- 41.
When you're upset, what helps most?
- Talking it out
- Space, then talking
- A hug
- A distraction
- 42.
What matters most to you in us?
- Trust
- Fun
- Growth
- Feeling understood
- 43.
How do you usually show love?
- Kind words
- Quality time
- Gifts
- Help with things
- Touch
- 44.
When we disagree, who usually calms down first?
- Me
- You
- About the same
- 45.
What would you protect first in our relationship?
- Our time together
- Our honesty
- Our laughter
- Our independence
